Piranha 3DD (2011)

4

A follow up to 2010’s surprise hit remake Piranha 3D, this movie sees the killer fish return to menace another resort. This time it’s a water park, ‘Wet And Wild’ run by the sleazy and unscrupulous Chet, played by David Koechner. His step daughter, and 49% owner of the park, Maddy (Danielle Panabaker) is aghast when he reveals the latest attraction – an ‘Adult Pool’. Of course, this pool is complete with strippers and model female lifeguards. But that’s only the start of Maddy’s troubles as soon the prehistoric killer piranha are found in the lake next door, into which the resort drains water. Chet, along with corrupt Sherriff Deputy, and Maddy’s ex boyfriend, Kyle (Chris Zylka) suppress the news to prevent Wet And Wild’s opening being delayed.

Christopher Lloyd revises his character Mr. Goodman (to whom Maddy turns for advice) from the first movie and is as watchable as ever. Ving Rhames also returns as Deputy Fallon, although this character was seen dying in the last instalment. The story is that only his legs got eaten. Yeah, right! He’s only included to provide another continuity link between the films which seems unnecessary, even if he has been fitted with Robert Rodriguez-esque prosthetics.

Inevitably piranha get into the water park, leading to mass bloodletting. Piranha 3D was so popular due to its black humour, explicit gore and nudity – including a 3D naked Kelly Brook! From the double entendre title Piranha 3DD, and the promotion material, viewers would naturally expect this release to be even more extreme. In reality, even though there are graphic mutilations, decapitations, a severed manhood, naked women and large breasts – it’s actually tamer than the original! Being an ex gore junky I can confidently state there’s a lot more creatively shed claret in Piranha 3D, almost up in the same league as Braindead. Characters in …3DD are more generic, less thought has gone into their creation. Another factor to consider is the inclusion of David Hasselhoff playing himself, acting as the washed up celebrity opening ‘Wet And Wild’. To start with it’s amusing watching ‘The Hoff’ send himself up, but the joke gets flogged to death and gets tired very quickly. I preferred his cameo in Spongebob Squarepants The Movie.

Perhaps my biggest gripe is the outtakes and deleted scenes shown over the closing credits. When a film does this I almost always find it an unforgivable breach of the fourth wall, except in Jackie Chan titles. The ending sets up for another sequel, that if made will be a case of even further diminished returns for the audience.

Director: John Gulager
Stars: Danielle Panabaker, David Hasselhoff, Matt Bush
Runtime: 83 min
Country: USA

Film Rating: ★½☆☆☆

4 Comments
  1. Tue Sorensen says

    Argh.

  2. Kevin Matthews says

    Saw this last week and totally agree with the rating, Chris. A bad, bad movie.

  3. Tue Sorensen says

    I was actually looking forward to this, but I could see at once that this was idiotic and unspeakably awful crap, and I won’t waste my time on it. It is just mindboggling that any of the same people should be involved with this farce of a sequel.

  4. Chris Bale says

    There was no need for a sequel, and keeping the novelty factor that made the first instalment decent was always going to be difficult. But the makers allowing the standard to drop so low is mind boggling.

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