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Home Spotlight

Flim Weakly – Moonlight

Chris Wyatt by Chris Wyatt
February 21, 2018
in Spotlight
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Jean Luc Godard once said “Film is truth, 24 frames per second.” Now, I don’t know what that means, but I do know it’s wrong. Film cannot be truth, because it is made of film, and truth is made of emotions or something. I also don’t know who Jean Luc Godard is, or what 24 frames have to do with it, as frames are usually found in Asda, for pictures and photos to sit in.

Although, actually, films are made of pictures, aren’t they? So maybe that’s what he meant, in which case, he’s very clever, even if he’s from somewhere that isn’t where I’m from.

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So, what, in fact, is a film?

Well, it’s a thing you go to see when it’s too early to see it on tv. It even comes out before the dvd. And it costs three times as much as watching it for free, which is really stupid. Unless it has nudity in it.

But not every film does.

“Bambi” didn’t.

Neither did “Spaceballs” and that has ‘balls’ in the title.

Welcome to Flim Weakly.

It’s Oscar season, so I watched last years winner, which got up on stage and stole the award from The Sound Of Music, or something. I don’t know, I didn’t watch it, because it’s on too late at night and at that time i’m sleeping, or getting banned from chat rooms.


Moonlight

Moonlight is about a sexy rich woman who runs a detective agency with Bruce Willis, and who both spend the majority of the story trying not to not have sex with each other. It feels like a Die Hard prequel, only not quite as funny, because it’s set in a big building and Bruce Willis has hair, but is not called John McClane.

Anyway, they don’t have sex, quite a lot, and solve whatever mystery by being smug, or something.

I have no idea how it won the Best Film Oscar, because its production values are rubbish, and it looks like it was made in the 80s, which is amazing, when you think about it, because that was ages ago.

Can’t really recommend it, although there was a bit with a ladder that was dope.

Marks out of 10….

….8.

DISCLAIMER! The thoughts and opinions displayed within Flim Weakly are those of its author, Chris Wyatt, and do not reflect the thoughts or opinions of FlickFeast or its affiliates.

Because we aren’t that stupid.

Tags: Bamibarry jenkinsbest picture winnerBruce Willisfilm reviewflim weaklyJean Luc Goddardmahershala aliMoonlightnaomie harrisOscarSpaceballsspooftrevante rhodes
Chris Wyatt

Chris Wyatt

Chris Wyatt bombarded FlickFeast with emails until they gave in and let him provide his unique, alternative opinion in a weekly column. He has no training or education within the film industry, knows little of cinema in general and may, in fact, still live with his mother. He does, however, inform us that he knows how an 'internet' works. @flimguywyatt

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