Flim Weakly Review- Halloween Classic: The Human Centipede

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Jean Luc Godard once said “Film is truth, 24 frames per second.” Now, I don’t know what that means, but I do know it’s wrong. The Human Centipede cannot be truth, because it’s made of film, and truth is made of emotions or something. I also don’t know who Jean Luc Godard is, or what 24 frames have to do with it, as frames are usually found in Asda, for pictures and photos to sit in.

Although, actually, films are made of pictures, aren’t they? So maybe that’s what he meant, in which case, he’s very clever, even if he’s from somewhere that isn’t where I’m from.

So, what, in fact, is a film?

Well, it’s a thing you go to see when it’s too early to see it on tv. It even comes out before the dvd. And it costs three times as much as watching it for free, which is really stupid. Unless it has nudity in it.

But not every film does.

“Bambi” didn’t.

Neither did “Spaceballs” and that has ‘balls’ in the title.

Welcome to FLIM WEAKLY.

This week, it’s Halloween, and because I’m skint, I borrowed this from a mate.

I say a mate, he’s actually my Mum.

The Human Centipede

A doctor who lives some place that isn’t here, tries to put bodies together in the wrong way and creates a human centipede, just like the title told us, which makes it a spoiler.

The people’s bodies aren’t happy about this, as it makes going poo poo very socially awkward and all a bit ‘eww!!!’ really.

In fact, when you really think about it, I’m not sure if the doctor is really a real doctor, or an imaginary one, as you have to be really smart to be a doctor and go to Uni for a year or something, and this guy doesn’t even seem to know that if he wanted to see someone do that kind of thing in someone’s mouth, he could’ve just gone on the internet.

Marks out of 10….

2.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions on The Human Centipede are those of the author and do not reflect the views and opinions of FlickFeast or any of its affiliates.

Because they aren’t that stupid.

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