Jean Luc Godard once said “Film is truth, 24 frames per second.” Now, I don’t know what that means, but I do know it’s wrong. Stan and Ollie cannot be truth, because it’s made of film, and truth is made of emotions or something. I also don’t know who Jean Luc Godard is, or what 24 frames have to do with it, as frames are usually found in Asda, for pictures and photos to sit in.
Although, actually, films are made of pictures, aren’t they? So maybe that’s what he meant, in which case, he’s very clever, even if he’s from somewhere that isn’t where I’m from.
So, what, in fact, is a film?
Well, it’s a thing you go to see when it’s too early to see it on tv. It even comes out before the dvd. And it costs three times as much as watching it for free, which is really stupid. Unless it has nudity in it.
But not every film does.
Neither did “Spaceballs” and that has ‘balls’ in the title.
Welcome to FLIM WEAKLY.
This week, the theatre showed an old film that was new.
Stan and Ollie
Alan Partridge goes back in time with a fat man and they wear suits and hats.
They both act quite thick, even though they’re not, and they lose all their money to a dick, which means they have to come to Britain and act thick in front of British people.
Ollie looks like a sweaty bollock. Their wives are funny. They have a bit of a falling out and then things get better, even though we know they’re both dead now, because the film took place ages ago, before the internet, which must’ve been shit.
Marks out of 10……..
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Because they aren’t that stupid. =