Jean Luc Godard once said “Film is truth, 24 frames per second.” Now, I don’t know what that means, but I do know it’s wrong. The Kitchen cannot be truth, because it’s made of film, and truth is made of emotions or something. I also don’t know who Jean Luc Godard is, or what 24 frames have to do with it, as frames are usually found in Asda, for pictures and photos to sit in.
Although, actually, films are made of pictures, aren’t they? So maybe that’s what he meant, in which case, he’s very clever, even if he’s from somewhere that isn’t where I’m from.
So, what, in fact, is a film?
Well, it’s a thing you go to see when it’s too early to see it on tv. It even comes out before the dvd. And it costs three times as much as watching it for free, which is really stupid. Unless it has nudity in it.
But not every film does.
Neither did “Spaceballs” and that has ‘balls’ in the title.
Welcome to FLIM WEAKLY.
This week, I went to The Kitchen. But not the one in my house.
The funny one from Bridesmaids becomes unfunny and starts a gang with a bunch of other ladies who are also not funny, because they are poor or something.
Its got guns in it and the ginger guy from Star Wars and it made me not want to be a criminal, which I guess is a good thing.
I also don’t know why it was called The Kitchen, because the women
don’t cook anything, because they’re all too busy being totes gangstas.
Marks out of 10….
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Because they aren’t that stupid.