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Home Spotlight

Flim Weakly Review- The Lion King

Chris Wyatt by Chris Wyatt
August 21, 2019
in Spotlight
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Jean Luc Godard once said “Film is truth, 24 frames per second.” Now, I don’t know what that means, but I do know it’s wrong. The Lion King cannot be truth, because it’s made of film, and truth is made of emotions or something. I also don’t know who Jean Luc Godard is, or what 24 frames have to do with it, as frames are usually found in Asda, for pictures and photos to sit in.

Although, actually, films are made of pictures, aren’t they? So maybe that’s what he meant, in which case, he’s very clever, even if he’s from somewhere that isn’t where I’m from.

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So, what, in fact, is a film?

Well, it’s a thing you go to see when it’s too early to see it on tv. It even comes out before the dvd. And it costs three times as much as watching it for free, which is really stupid. Unless it has nudity in it.

But not every film does.

“Bambi” didn’t.

Neither did “Spaceballs” and that has ‘balls’ in the title.

Welcome to FLIM WEAKLY.

This week, I blessed the rains down in Africa.

The Lion King

I thought this was a cartoon, but it’s totes real.

There’s a Lion who’s the King (but not like Elvis) and he has a kid, who will one day be King (but not like Elvis), but only once his dad is dead.

Then his dad dies by letting his brother (who’s a prick) kill him, which was really stupid of him, but whatever.

Then the kid, who thinks it’s his fault that his dad got stood on, pisses off to live with a pig and, I think, some sort of rabbit. They sing a bit, which is weird, because I always assumed that animals couldn’t keep rhythm (unlike Elvis).

Anyway, the kid grows up, hears voices and goes home to kill his Uncle, so that he can become King (but not like Elvis), which is possibly a hate crime, but then, they’re animals, and they don’t know what racism is.

A bit like some people on twitter.



Marks out of 10….

…5.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions on The Lion King are those of the author and do not reflect the views and opinions of FlickFeast or any of its affiliates.

Because they aren’t that stupid.

Tags: beyonceclassicDisneydonald gloverDumbflim weaklyremakethe lion king
Chris Wyatt

Chris Wyatt

Chris Wyatt bombarded FlickFeast with emails until they gave in and let him provide his unique, alternative opinion in a weekly column. He has no training or education within the film industry, knows little of cinema in general and may, in fact, still live with his mother. He does, however, inform us that he knows how an 'internet' works. @flimguywyatt

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